Tuesday, May 12, 2009
5:34 PM | Posted by Lori ~ The Simple Life at Home | | Edit Post
I've been doing a little thinking lately and I've realized that I've been handling becoming a "working mother" all wrong. Since I started working about a month and a half ago, our home life has basically been allowed to go to seed. Here's just a little snippet of what it's been like lately:
- "Mom, there aren't any clean forks!!"
- "Honey, do I have any clean shirts?!"
- "Uh, Mom? Why do your legs feel like a Sasquatch?!"
- "Sandwiches for dinner again???"
It's not been pleasant.
I've been falling into the trap of our day - allowing the urgent to take precedence over the important. I feel like I do nothing but run from one fire to another, trying to put them all out before my house burns down.
Last week I was thumbing through one of my Elizabeth George books, Life Management for Busy Women. Boy do I feel like I need this book more than ever! I was reminded that, even though I am now working, my priorities should not, can not, change. They must remain now and ever more God first, husband second, children third, home fourth and anything else after that. I need to start to take steps to reclaim my life and not let myself get overwhelmed by the busy-ness I now encounter.
Even though I'm now what the world refers to as a working mother, I have decided not to think of myself in those terms. Instead, I'm trying to reteach my brain to think of myself as a mother who works. It may seem like silly semantics, but I think it will help me to remember that my first call is to my family.
The whole reason I'm working is for my family. Financially, it's no longer feasible for me to be home what with our real estate investments having gone south and having put the kids into a great, but expensive, school. But what good is it if I can't pull myself together enough to be a good wife and mother? If I'm too tired to be kind and loving? If I'm too disorganized to provide my family with the basics?
So the question is how do I go about not just changing my way of thinking, but applying it to real life? I mean, the reality is that I have to keep working (although it would be lovely if Hubby said I could just come back home!). Just calling myself by something different isn't actually going to make the workload any lighter. I have to work smarter, not harder.
One of the first things I've done is to purchase a white board which I've used to manage all the information I need to use each day. I divided it into 8 boxes - one for each day plus an extra box for making note of things I need to add to the grocery shopping list. Within each day's box, I make note of what we'll be having for dinner (in red), events or afterschool activities (in green), who is in charge of preparing devotions (in black - and please don't think we are so super-spiritual because of this. We've only been doing it for a week or two and purely out of sheer necessity for the Word of God to regain precedence in our home), and major homework projects or test dates for my kids (in blue).
In just the week I've been using it, the board has helped me tremendously. I have it on display in the kitchen and each morning I am reminded to thaw something for dinner, or that we will be at school late due to rock climbing club. I no longer find out about an exam the morning of the exam on the way to school. It's simply helped me to breathe a little easier and to not feel so panicked all the time.
And as for that workload? Well, I have to admit that I've been very blessed to have a husband who will jump in and help out. He's helped out with laundry, dishes, mopping and more and I don't even have to ask. Even better, he doesn't mind at all!
I've also learned that there are some things that I have to let go. While I would love to provide my family with a spotless house all the time, it's probably not going to happen very often right now. But I can focus on the big things that need done and get to the rest when I can. I may not be able to cook meals that are as elaborate as those I used to make, but with proper planning I can provide healthy, tasty meals that will nourish us.
It's a matter of priorities and balance. Yes, I'd love for everything to be perfect. But in all honesty, it wasn't perfect when I was a stay at home, homeschooling mom either. It's easy to romanticize how things used to be. However, the time has come for me to stop being wistful about being a stay at home mom and roll up my sleeves and get busy.
- 2013 (5)
- 2012 (1)
- 2011 (4)
- 2010 (18)
- 2008 (285)
- 2007 (214)
Powered by Blogger.
- Rambling through life
- Walkin' The Walk
- Doha Life
- Menu Plan Monday
- Thankful Thursday
- Spirit Lifts
- Movin' On Out...To The Middle East
- Bloggity Stuff
- Conquering Self
- Smart Habit Saturday
- Creative Counterpart Study
- The Overloaded Life
- Favorite Ingredient Friday
- Being A Working Mom
- No Regrets
- Heart of the Matter
- I AM study
- ▼ May (9)
- ► 2008 (285)