The Simple Life at Home

(Has that title already been taken?)


Well, let's start with the good. The American School was really, really amazing! The facilities are incredible. If you have ever watched "High School Musical" with your kids and said, "yeah, that's not what schools really look like," you should see this school. My school had crowded halls, no open spaces (unless you count the field), and was antiquated. Or maybe it's me that's antiquated. Anyhow, this school was beautiful. I was very impressed. And I was impressed with the kids and classes I saw as well.


We are taking the plunge and going to turn in the application and enrollment forms. I'm nervous. Not about how they'll do there. They both are very smart and very social. I'm nervous about stupid things, like their handwriting. That's not something I've really stressed over the years. I mean, come on, how much of real life is handwritten? Notes to yourself. Shopping lists. That's about it. Most of what we do is electronic now, right?


I'm nervous about the social effects it will have on my kids. While I trust them to make wise choices, I know how strong peer pressure can be.


I'm dreading the homework. I don't even want to talk about the homework.


Jennifer asked why I was opting to put them in school. It's not that homeschooling isn't working for us. It is. But having moved across the world, it's a different situation. There is no active homeschooling support here like we had in Miami. We have made only one friend who homeschools and she has a 6 year old son, so there are no peers for my kids. There are no activities, no field trips, no friends who "get" what your life is like (for either the kids or me). Also, we live in a completely Arab neighborhood, mostly conservative Muslim. They pretty much ignore us, so there are no friends in the neighborhood for the kids. The only place they've made friends is at church and even that has been a slow process. They need more of a life.


Also, they need more than I can offer them here. This school is amazing. The entire 8th grade is going to Malaysia next week. The electives they offer, the after school activities - all of it are things I can't provide for them here.

We were told to get our applications in first thing tomorrow morning as there had been several withdrawals and we might be able to get both kids in within a week or two.

Now, the actual process of enrolling them in school? That has not been so fantastic. A medical exam is required. "It just takes 10 minutes," the registrar told me. "Go to you local clinic," she said. Well, that was a big mistake.

Medical care is subsidized here. You pay about $30 a year and receive almost free care at the government run clinics. Unfortunately, the old maxim "You get what you pay for" is true. Here's how it went.

Being that most everything shuts down from 1 pm until 4 pm, we arrived at the clinic around 3:45 so we could get in and out quickly. Ha!! At 3:57, they opened the doors and I walked up to the window. The women, completely veiled, were talking amongst themselves on the other side of the glass. Finally, one manages to take note of me and harshly says, "4:00! Go sit!" I tell her I just want to ask if I'm in the right place and she shouts, "It's not 4:00!"

Keeping my mouth shut, as I've learned to do here, I sit down for the next two minutes. At 4, myself and several other people walk up to the window, only to be ignored again. Finally we are told around 4:10 that the doctor isn't here. "Wait," one of them says to me. I cannot tell if it's the same woman or not. Wait where, I wonder. Here at the window, or go sit down again? Finally she takes my children's health cards, makes a note and hands me two laminated numbers - 4 and 6. "Go down there," she says. Down where? There is a whole hallway of "down there." Some man walks up to me and takes my numbers and points to a door that says Pediatric Clinic. I go there but the door is locked. I sit to wait. A minute later another man walks up, tries the door and walks in with his three children.

You aren't called. The numbers mean nothing. It's just whoever gets to the door first. The doctor sits at a desk and waits. Finally we make our way in, I explain to him why we are there and show him the required form. He scribbles something in Arabic on a piece of scrap paper, hands it to me and tells me to go next door.

Next door they take my children's vital signs, check their vision and weigh and measure them. Then they look at the Arabic writing and begin to write orders for blood, urine and stool tests. Uh, wait? All this is necessary? Yes, I'm told. I notice that they have recorded Daniel at weighing half the weight of Emily, when he is actually a couple of pounds heavier. I point it out to the nurse (?) and she tells me not to worry about it, the machine adds a little bit. I repeatedly explain to her that it's a huge difference and impossible. Finally, she relents and calls him back in to be re-weighed. When she realizes her mistake, there's no acknowledgement of her mistake. She merely whites out the incorrect number and walks off to take care of other people while I wait. Yes, wait for the White Out to dry. For 15 minutes. Finally the other nurse (?) notices I and the piece of paper and picks it up and reminds the other woman to finish it. We are then told to go back to the doctor next door.

Where we are told to go to the lab. We make our way down to the lab and she hands us empty vials and says she needs first, ahem, fruits of the morning, shall we say? She opens at 7 and we can turn in our samples and see the doctor at 9 am. Hubby wanted it done NOW, so he took the kids back over to the clinic and asked the doctor to fill out the papers right then and there. Of course, that was a no go, but he did learn that we needed some kind of Qatari official card listing their immunizations. Oh, and by the way, they'd have to be immunized for TB. Which leaves a scar. And isn't given in the US. I had a fit at the thought of scarring my kids for a vaccine they don't need.

This morning I trudged off to the National Healthy Authority to get the card. After figuring out the right place to go, I got the joy of sitting and watching the lone woman there continue her filing for 10 minutes while I sat ask her desk. Finally she asked what I needed. She quickly filled out the card and told me that Emily would not need to be vaccinated, but Daniel would because he was under 12. No other explanation, no listening to me. But the mandatory TB test? Oh, that's only done some other place and only on Sundays. Then the test would be read three days later and then the doctor could sign off.

Finally Hubby announced he wasn't waiting until next Wednesday. He went back to the doctor and convinced him to sign off on everything else but the TB test. So I trudged back to the school and turned it all in. That "10 minute visit" turned out to take hours and hours of time and frustration.

Anyways, the papers are in. We've been told to expect a call next week for placement tests. We aren't sure yet if Emily will get in at the same time due to space limitations, but we will see. Thanks for you encouraging words and support!! I'll keep you posted!

Today's Heart of the Matter focuses on the difficult balance between playing the roles of both mom and teacher. For every homeschool mom, this is something that we deal with at times.

From personal experience, I believe that it's much easier to handle these dual roles if you homeschool from the beginning. It's all that the child knows and everyone is used to mom being the teacher.

Where I see people really struggling with this is when they decide to begin homeschooling after the child has been in a more traditional school setting for several years.

One thing that I firmly believe is that the school environment, not intentionally but just as a natural result, sets up a parent versus teacher mentality. How many times do you remember your parent telling you something that directly contradicts your teacher? Tiffany had a good example of it this week. While her example is about a grammar question, sometimes there are deeper issues at stake such as one's world view.

The reason I've gotten down this trail is that once you've gotten to that point, it's harder to bring a child home and have them respect you as a teacher as well. They have been trained that the teacher knows best. (In many cases, such as algebra, this may be true!!!) I have had many moms tell me that their children won't listen because "my old teacher did it differently."

The first thing I would recommend in this situation is to give your child some time to decompress from school. When you first bring them back home, allow them some time to just chill. Don't push academics for the first few weeks. Encourage reading, explore your neighborhood, maybe pick up a book of science projects at the library and have them pick one to work on. As the child learns that education is not just sitting in a classroom, they will hopefully become more receptive to what you have to offer. You can gradually move into more formal studying once you have gained their trust.

For those who have been homeschooling all along, there is often very little delineation between your job as mother and teacher. All of life can be used as a teaching opportunity - from cooking, to driving, to shopping. As a bumper sticker I love says, "Homeschooling - the world is our classroom." Personally, I love the fact that our schooling is not limited to the time we spend poring over books, but is woven throughout our lives.

Balancing being both mom and teacher to your child is easier than you think, once you have gained the child's respect and trust. It can be a joy and a heartbreak. The ultimate thing to remember is that both of these roles are indeed God-ordained for parents. In Deuteronomy we are called to teach our children. In fact, today's school model is very modern in the scheme of history. Homeschooling was the norm for thousands of years.

By choosing to wear both hats, you are following in a time-honored tradition. It may take a little getting used to at first, but after a while it will flow effortlessly.

Ok. For those of you who don't know me, I'm not normally like this.

Normally, I have things planned out two years in advance and know exactly where I'm going and what my goals for the kids education are.

Not this year.

I know that I already posted about what we are doing this year. Well, it's changed. Again. But this time, I've already paid and sunk money into my decision, so there will be no more waffling.

We ended up ordering Switched On Schoolhouse. With a little tweaking, their grade-level curriculum will work perfectly for us. The changes we made are ordering Algebra 1 (rather than Pre-Algebra) for Emily and ordering 7th grade History and Geography (rather than 6th grade which focuses on ancient cultures which we did this year) for Daniel.

We've used Switched On Schoolhouse for science before and the kids really enjoyed the interactive format and I enjoyed the ease and simplicity of grading and record-keeping.

Since it doesn't seem as though reading literature is a big part of the English courses, I've given the kids a list of reading material. They each had to choose 4 books from the list. Here are their choices:

Emily

• Little Women, by Louisa May Alcott
• Roots, by Alex Haley
• And Then There Were None, by Agatha Christie
• Romeo & Juliet/West Side Story, by William Shakespeare/Irving Shulman

Daniel

• Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde, by Robert Louis Stevenson
• Kidnapped, by Robert Louis Stevenson
• Frankenstein, by Mary Shelley
• Watership Down, by Richard Adams

We'll still be using Rosetta Stone to continue our Arabic lessons. The funny thing is you'd think living in the Persian Gulf area would be the reason we'd want to learn Arabic. Nothing could be further from the truth. We'd be better off learning Hindi to help living here. But since Hubby is Arab, we want them to be better able to communicate with their extended family as well as embrace this part of their heritage.

Now, that's it. I promise. No more changes.

Unless I get that Rainbow Resource Center catalog . . .

Well, as I mentioned earlier in the week, this subject of what we'll be doing for school this year has definitely been the hardest ever in our homeschooling lives.

Having moved across the ocean has given us pause to think about why we homeschool and whether or not, at this point, it's the most beneficial thing for our kids. In the end, Hubby and I agreed to apply to the school here which he most liked, and allow God to make the decision as to whether or not they got in.

They didn't get in. (Please note: If your screen is shaking a little bit, that's me doing the happy dance, jumping around like a fool in the background. No pictures, please.)

So, all summer I have been planning on having them transition this year to an online school, in the event that they do go to a traditional school next year. This would give them the chance to get used to working with other teachers, other people's expectations, etc.

The school I was interested I in ended up having some concerns about, so I spent Monday night and Tuesday in a tizzy. We looked at some other schools here in town, but they are all filled with extensive waiting lists. I considered ordering Sonlight again, but didn't feel right about it. This past year and a half have really been a struggle for my kids. I LOVE the curriculum, but it hasn't been a good fit for them lately. I looked at the online school K-12, but it's cost is pretty steep for us.

In the end, I found another online school Keystone National Middle School. It seems to be a good fit for what we are looking for. The classes are appropriate for where my kids are, the cost isn't too bad (though I'm still hoping Hubby's company will help pay for it, in lieu of paying 5x as much in tuition at a local private school which is in his contract), and it seems to be reputable.

If you know something bad about it, just don't tell me ok? I don't want to have to go through this all over again. Sometimes ignorance is bliss, ya know?

In addition to the basic curriculum from Keystone, we'll also be doing our Rosetta Stone Arabic (I'm more convinced now about our need for this since those mean cousins were talking about my kids in Arabic!), signing up for progressing towards the kids getting black belts, Emily will be continuing in her piano lessons and Daniel would like to begin guitar.

Whew! That's what we'll be doing this year. What about you?

As I've mentioned in the past (here and here), we have struggled with whether or not to continue homeschooling here in Doha. In the end, we decided that we would enroll the kids in an online school for this year and attempt to move them into a traditional school next year.

Well, there's a snag. (Isn't there always?)

After trying to get information to enroll the kids in said online school, things started to seem a little fishy. Curious, I did a little more research and didn't like what I saw. The "school" is owned by a woman who has a history of lawsuits and who also has many other schools which she runs - all offering the exact same curriculum, but under many different names and price schemes. Like 20 different names. After reading through some parent reviews, I was concerned enough to decide (at 2 am last night) that this wasn't where I wanted to put my children.

Which leaves me in a dilemma. School should be starting in a week or two and I have no curriculum. I mean, I could work for a little bit (a month or so) with what we have.

I'm not finding any other online school that I like. Most offer a set curriculum for each grade level (as opposed to letting the parent design the coursework). Some seem to be too easy for what my kids have been doing. Others are just too darn expensive.

I investigated returning to using Sonlight, which we have used successfully for the past four years. But I still have concerns over whether it's what is best for my kids now (the last year or two have found me begging them to read their books). On top of that, to ship the books here to Qatar the charges would be close to $400!!!!

So now I'm spending the morning with a knot in my stomach and a cloud over my head. If anyone has any great ideas, let me know. I'm open to just about anything at this point.

I'm hoping it's not a permanent condition, but my mind is just blank the last couple of days. I can't think of a blessed thing to say that might be of interest to anyone, save, oh, the dog. And even she would think I might possibly be talking of giving her a treat since, you know, she doesn't speak English.

I think it's just a by-product of stress and busy-ness. I've gotten myself (and my kids) into the unenviable position of having to cram 12 weeks worth of school into 5 weeks. We will be leaving to visit Hubby's family in Jordan in mid-July and I'd like to have it all done by the time we leave.

We started falling behind after we spent most of December with my family in Arizona. Then we spent the majority of January getting ready for the movers to come and pack up all our worldly belongings. February was pretty quiet and we actually got back into a normal groove. Then March - well, it was a lost cause with time ticking down to the big day.

Normally I'm a very relaxed homeschooler. We don't really follow a schedule, just a plan that we work through our work at our own pace and when it's done ,it's done. I would much rather my kids and I spend more time on things that interest us than we finish up quickly and end on time.

However, Hubby and I have made a decision. (Well, it's really my decision, with Hubby's backing - he doesn't get much involved in the homeschooling stuff since I'm the one that actually does it.) Since the children did not get into private school this year - no places in their grade levels - I've decided to enroll them in an online school for the 2008-2009 year. There are a couple of reasons for this.

First, I think they need to learn more accountability than I have taught them. There've been many time when I've given an assignment and then forgotten about it. Or I let them slide on neatness or quality. I think it will be good for them to have an outside critique so they can learn that it's not just that mommy is being too picky, but that quality is expected of them.

Second, I think that they have gotten bored with my preferred curriculum. It's very reading-heavy and even I have trouble keeping up with the pace and with some of the book choices we are given. Even I find myself wondering why we are reading certain books.

Third, it will give them more independence and responsibility. They have to get their work done in the alotted time and I plan on encouraging them to learn to budget their time and use it wisely. I think this is something that will benefit them throughout their lives.

So for the next little while I may be unusually quiet. Or it may be just for this week as the reality of our situation settles in. Basically we need to do two days' worth of work every day. Ugh!

Ah, scheduling.

The bane of the homeschool mother's existence.

I have heard from so many women how difficult it is to get a workable schedule. There are just so many things to do - both academically, extra-curricularly (is that a word?), and in just living life.

The schedule I'm describing below is the one that we roughly followed while living in the States. I'm still working on figuring out a schedule here.

First off, we homeschool through the summer. I know for some of you that seems like I'm torturing my kids, but remember that we lived in Miami - hot city. So we would take our long vacation from Thanksgiving to New Year's. We found that there is so much fun stuff to do during that time that we wanted to be able to really enjoy the season. Plus it was too hot to do much in the summer, so that time was well-used to continue our schoolwork. Lesson: Don't be tied to the traditional school schedule. You have the freedom to arrange things how it works for you.

Secondly, we only did school four days a week. This allowed us one extra day a week to do errands, attend a homeschool support group, and get what needed done done. We still finished our weekly assignments, we just did a little more every day to get that extra day off. Lesson: Having that extra school-free day scheduled in gave us freedom to not worry that everything else was intruding on our school life. You know that stuff comes up. Just plan for it.

Thirdly, we don't use clocks and set class times for our schooling. Most families I know don't, but some people come into homeschooling thinking this is the way to go. We work on something until it's done and then move on. History might take 10 minutes, math an hour. We just go through our assignments for the day and when it's done, it's done. Lesson: Don't try to fill your lessons with unnecessary fluff, just to make it an hour for each course. It's a waste of your time and your child's interest.

We use a curriculum (Sonlight) which provides weekly lesson plans, but if yours doesn't provide this, you can simply sit down at the beginning of the week and plan out what needs to be done for the week. I've tried all different variations of this theme - doing all math one day and all science another, letting my kids work through the assignment list at their own pace, etc..

So here's a small peak at what our day looks like:

We begin school around 9 am. This follows breakfast and chores. We start off reading the Bible and praying together, then I do the readings for history. Then we will do a quiz on the previous day's history. Then they do their math. They are responsible for checking their own work and correcting it (through the help of their curriculum Teaching Textbooks). Then they alternate between their reading assignment and science, each taking a turn with the reading book. Usually one will finish before the other, so while they are waiting their turn for the next project they work on either grammar or vocabulary. Then we will have a time when I read aloud an assigned novel which goes with what we are studying in history. Right now they are working on research projects, so I give them time for that. Occasionally we will go through a few lessons of Rosetta Stone for our foreign language.

We usually finish up around 12:30, they have lunch. After lunch they go to their rooms and spend an hour alone. I think we all need this break from each other since we are together 24/7. Then they have the afternoon free to enjoy. They may read, do games, draw, play video games, go online, etc.

Next year, it looks like I'll be enrolling them in an online school. Hubby and I both feel that they need more structure and, while they won't be attending private school this year (hooray!!) they may next year. Putting them in a setting where they have more accountability and structure will be a good way to prepare them for a more traditional school setting, I think.

So that's a pretty basic outline of our schedule - from the big picture to the daily nitty-gritty. Be sure to visit The Heart of the Matter to get a look at how other people are doing it. There's millions of ways, trust me!

I would say that the concern over a child's socialization is the number two reason, behind lack of confidence in themselves as teachers, why people tell me they can't homeschool.

The sad thing is that this is such a prevalent misconception about homeschoolers. Most homeschool parents bend over backwards to make sure that their children are well-socialized. But the bigger question remains what is socialization exactly? And what part should it play in our child-rearing?

Wikipedia defines it as, "Socialization is the process by which humans or animals learn the values, norms and culture of their particular society. They learn to conform to the way of life in their society."

Basically socialization is the process by which our children learn to be healthy, productive, responsible members of society. Now, do I want my children to be socialized by other children their age - immature, cruel children often. Or do I want my children to learn how to be a happy and healthy adult from other happy and healthy adults? I would much rather be the overseer of who is teaching my children the "values, norms and culture" by which they will live their lives, than turn that task over to any random child who happens to be assigned to their class.

All this is not to say that I think we should keep children away from other kids or even away from those who have different opinions than ourselves. But we need to be able to be there to offer guidance and feedback. We need to protect and shelter our children from those who would, unthinkingly, hurt our children's tender spirits and faith.

Now that I have that off my chest, I'll step down off my soapbox and share ways that we have provided opportunities for our children to interact with other kids their ages. Having just moved to Doha, Qatar we are right now in a bit of a lull as we are still trying to get settled in, but I'm sure that we'll be getting in the swing of things soon.

* Church - this has always been the basis of our social lives, even before we had children. Sunday school classes, youth groups, retreats, social activities - these are all opportunities for our children to spend time with mostly like-valued children.

* Homeschool Groups - We have belonged to numerous homeschool groups over the past 9 years of homeschooling. Some have been warm and welcoming, others have been difficult to break into because of cliques. It can be hard, but with persistence you can find a group that is right for your which will bless both you as a parent and your children.

* Sports - Neither of my children has a competitive bone in their body. We are not into team sports, though we have given it a try with soccer and basketball. However we eventually settled on karate. Though they were in a large group of kids who they made friends with, karate served to give them physical activity, but in a way in which they were really competing against themselves.

* Enrichment Classes - Throughout their homeschooling lives, my children have always participated in some type of enrichment classes. Whether it was through a co-op put together casually by a few moms, a huge homeschool program, or courses offered by local parks, they have found both education and friendship here.

* Neighbors - I know that for some people, neighborhood children can pose a problem. But I see them as an opportunity. Be the kind of mom who opens up her home, where all the kids want to hang out. You'll not only be there to guide the conversation and activity, you'll also get to see your child and be able to be a blessing to those children in the neighborhood who don't have a strong relationship with their own parents.

Those are the main areas where we have found social opportunities for our children. They are both happy, well-adjusted children who are comfortable both with children their own age as well as adults. Think about it - when was the last time you were confined to being friends solely with people your own age and socio-economic background? I would wager it was in school. Homeschooling opens up the world to your kids, allowing them to take part in all the normal activities that they will participate in as adults. It also provides them with the opportunity to observe YOU as you go about your life ~ all the little things you do in your effort to honor God as you go through your day.

That's real socialization.

(Edited slightly for the Carnival of Homeschooling, being hosted by my friend, Tiffany, this week. Thanks for visiting and I hope you find something helpful for you here.)

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I found this wonderful Friday meme over at The Heart of the Matter, a wonderful online homeschooling magazine. I'm so excited because I have loved homeschooling and love sharing about it.

Today's theme is, "What I Wish I Had Known My First Year." Gosh, my first year seems so long ago it's hard to even remember what I did or didn't know then. Now that Emily is finishing up 7th grade and Daniel is preparing to enter middle school, and we are considering putting them in school due to some upcoming changes in our family, I have a lot to look back and learn from though.

I wish I had know how fleeting my time with my children would be. I love the saying, "The days are long, but the years are short." When I realize that in just 5 years one of my children will be off to college and out of our home possibly, it's shocking. There is so much to teach them, so much to impress upon them. In the midst of all the, oh heck, I'll just say it, drudgery of being a homeschooling wife and mom (you know what I mean - the endless cleaning, meal preparation, lesson planning, teaching, correcting, etc.) there are precious, teachable moments when you really connect with your child's heart. I would savor each of those moments a little more.

I wish I had known that socialization is NOT what the world says it is. Let's face it, this is one of the biggest concerns most people have for homeschooled children. And, yes, there are some freaks out there who homeschool their children and withhold them from any contact with the world outside their family. But that's not the norm. Most homeschool families are so connected with the world around them. Homeschooled children learn how to deal with people of all ages - not just those of the same age and social class. A dear friend of mine often tells me that my kids aren't in the "real world." (Yes, we are still friends.) But what I think she doesn't understand is that my kids' world is much more "real" than hers'. My kids go about my day with me, watching how the world works. They socialize with everyone from infants to senior citizens. They are able to look an adult in the eye and have a conversation. I get compliments all the time from people who can just sense a difference in them due to their maturity level.

I wish I had known that unit studies are just not right for everybody. There is such a push for unit studies in homeschooling circles. And they are great, they really are. Our first two years we used one of the unit study giants that are out there and had a ball. But I was exhausted! I spent hours and hours each week tracking down all the books and materials I would need. Did my kids have fun learning? You betcha! But it didn't work in the long haul for us. We now use a more literature-based program where everything comes in one box and, for us, it has been a godsend.

I wish I had known that it's ok (and probably good) to switch curriculum mid-year. When you first start homeschooling, you child is not the only one learning. You are too - you are learning your child's learning style, your teaching style, and what each curriculum has to offer. I cannot tell you the times I invested money in some program and tried to slog through it, even though it didn't work for our family, just because I had spent the money. Now I'm not advertising wasting money. But I would advise new homeschoolers to not sink a lot of money into the first thing or two they try. It may look really good in the catalog or at the convention, but real life has a way of making the flaws show up. Be willing to acknowledge when something isn't working and take steps to correct it.

I wish I had known that God is an infinitely better teacher than me. Let me tell you, ladies, I am not a trained teacher. But somehow, through all my failings (and they are many) my children are doing well. Sometimes I wonder how, but they are. Even though we are a little loose with our schedule and even though I often answer a question with "I don't know," they are pretty darn smart. I accredit this to God. He provides what I miss. I've heard that there are holes in every education. But I've come to understand that God knows what my kids need, more than I do. He'll help them get it, even when I screw up. Now this isn't license to just slack off and do nothing! But it is comforting to know that when I fail, the kids have a much, much better Teacher to rely on.

If you've come by way of The Heart of the Matter, thanks so much for stopping by! Well, actually, no matter HOW you got here, thanks for stopping by! If you would like to discuss homeschooling with me, I'm always in the mood to share, so feel free.

I'm a little bit late in announcing this, but my friend, Tiffany, is hosting this week's Homeschool Carnival. I give her huge credit because she's, oh, about 20 months pregnant and has a toddler and a middle school child. Way to go, girl!!

There are some amazing posts included here covering just about every aspect you can imagine, and some you couldn't, about homeschooling. If you are a homeschooler, or are considering it, it would be worth your time to drop by and check it out.

Tiffany asked if I minded if she included my recent post on re-evaluating my reasons for homeschooling. Or course, being a sucker for attention, I said, "Put it in!!" If you haven't read it, you can find it here.

So I've been thinking a lot lately about homeschooling. Don't get me wrong - I am a dyed-in-the-wool homeschooler. We've always homeschooled and have always planned to homeschool all the way through high school. But now circumstances of our lives are changing and I'm being forced to look at my reasons for homeschooling.

To quickly sum it up, we are moving overseas and my husband's employer has offered to pay for private school. Initially I completely dismissed it, but now I find myself questioning that decision. Is it really the right thing for me to not even consider something that might be an amazing opportunity for my children? I've got some thinkin' to do. Would you care to join me as I work through my reasons for homeschooling?

1. I believe that God has charged parents with the responsibility of their child's education. I believe that the father and mother are to be the primary teachers of their children and that children should view parents as a source of wisdom and blessing, not as irritations and fools as many children today seem to feel.
2. I feel that many children today are not allowed to be children because of excessive time spent in school and subsequent homework. I firmly believe that children need time to explore and to play and daydream and create. In many areas, I know that children get home from school around 4 pm, go to various extracurricular activities, and spend several hours each night doing homework. Once you add in eating and bathing, when do they have to time just be kids? I really have no counterpoint to this. It's something I feel very strongly about.
3. Homeschooled children can move at their own pace and follow their interests. If your child is a math genius they can whiz right through learning the times tables instead of spending weeks on it because the rest of the class needs more practice. Conversely, if you child is a struggler in some area, you can give them the time they need without feeling pressured to move forward because the rest of the class needs to move along. Also, if in your learning adventures something captures your child's imagination (as the Parthenon and mythology did recently for my son) you can allow them the freedom to delve deeper into it.
4. Homeschooling allows me to shelter my children from some of the world. Yep, I admit. I shelter my children. That's my job as a parent. There is a trend today to allow children to grow up to fast, without also requiring the maturity needed to handle it. Generations ago people were "young adults" not "teenagers." Now we have an entire generation of kids who emulate rap stars and pop stars. Kids are having sex and engaging in drug and alcohol usage at younger and younger ages. Now, I'm not one to think that my children need to be oblivious about the world. Jesus tells us to be wise as serpents and innocent as doves. My kids watch tv and movies, listen to contemporary music, hang out with kids from all socio-economic levels and ethnicities, and have MySpace pages. But yet, we closely monitor all aspects of all of it so that we can train them and help them learn to discern what is beneficial and godly versus what will only drag them away from God and from living a godly life. The point of sheltering anything, be it children or tomato plants, is to allow it to grow strong and healthy before exposing it to the harshness of the world. We gradually allow the kids to have more and more exposure to the world, while offering guidance and wisdom. But eventually, we know, they will be off on their own and make their own decisions. Hopefully by then we will have given them a strong foundation to fall back on.
5. We homeschool so that we can teach our children our values, not the values of some education committee in Washington, D.C. who has decided what my children should learn. I want to be the one who decides when and what my children learn about sex. For the record, they both know the whole story, but they've heard about it from the position that sex is God's gift and is to be reserved for marriage. I'm not a prude, but I don't want my kids learning about it from someone who has a completely different value system. I also want my children to know that evolution is not the fact that it is taught as in the schools. There are many flaws in the theory that cannot be explained. And yet evidence supporting the Bible is being found all the time. My kids know the theory of evolution and the origins of the world, but they also know the Biblical position. We look at all sides of an issue - not just the politically correct ones.

I guess those are the big issues for me. Some of them would not be such an issue at the school in Qatar. For instance, school is done for the day at 1:00. That's about what time we finish up here at home. That still allows for plenty of family time and homework time and time for extracurriculars. We would still have plenty of time to be the primary influence on our kids.

In addition, as Qatar is a Muslim country, the conduct of people in general is much more conservative and reserved. Clothing is modest (and no, we won't need to wear burkas!), sex outside of marriage is actually illegal (and will be punished by deportation) so nothing more than flirting goes on amongst teens, and drugs and alcohol are not an issue. Discipline and respect at the school is strictly enforced. So that covers another base.

Much as I would like to claim that my children are mental giants who have already completed trig and physics, they are average kids who learn at a normal pace. They like to read what THEY want to read, but complain when they have to read something for school. They hate doing math drills, don't like writing and, in general, are just normal kids who would rather being outside playing. So going too fast or too slow is not really an issue for my particular kids. And if they had something that really caught their interest, I'm sure they would manage to investigate and learn more about it if they really want to. Kids do it all the time.

That just leaves the "whose values do you teach" question. But I know that any good parent is going to be involved in their kids' schoolwork, whether they are homeschooled or otherwise. They will get involved and know what their kids are learning. If something comes up that is contrary to our values system, we can address it and study the issue at home.

I don't know what we will decide, to be honest. I'm torn. I am really heartbroken at the idea of giving up homeschooling, but know that this might be a chance for my kids to stretch and grown and learn. We are deep in prayer about it. I'd appreciate any comments that address the issues here or maybe some I've overlooked.

Thanks for sticking in and reading through this and for any opinions you have to offer.

This super cute video was sent to me by my sister-in-law (who actually does need a van this big!!). The kids and I have been singing lines from the song for a couple of weeks now.

Enjoy!!

School has been a nightmare around here lately.

When you homeschool your children, the entire burden of their education generally falls upon you. In most homeschool families, the father's contribution tends to be limited to providing financial support, encouragement, and discipline. Some families have worked it out so that fathers teach one or two subjects that they may be particularly strong in, but that is probably the exception since most homeschooling dads need to work longer hours to support the family on just one income.

And thus it falls to the mother.

I think I've done pretty well by kids. When testing comes around annually, they've always performed well-above grade level. They manage to hold their own in conversations with other kids. They are both excellent readers.

And yet each day for the past few months, I've been ready to jump in front of a bus by the time we finish up our schoolwork.

I've needed to re-set each and every one of their Science quizzes because they've failed them the first time. I go from one to the other and back again the entire time we are working. I ask questions about what they've studied and get blank looks in return.

I have not taught them how to study.

I've never made them "cram" for a test. Or do extra homework-type assignments once our day is finished. I've never taught them how to take notes. Or how to form questions to ask while they're reading.

I guess I just assumed that these skills would come naturally. I don't know why I would think that - now that I've been thinking about it, I realize that they are skills I was taught in school. But somehow I just never thought about it.

So for the remainder of this week, we will be doing a minimum of what is actually on our schedule to do school-wise, and focus on learning these study skills.

And hopefully I won't be seeking out any buses after that.

So...

After discussing the whole homeschooling-fiasco that was yesterday with Hubby, he had some interesting points to make. (Side note: Why don't husbands get that we are often just looking for someone to listen and offer support, instead of solving the problem? Sigh...)

• One is that children in "school" work significantly more hours than my children do - nearly twice as much, when you factor in homework. He wants to see them spending more time on their schoolwork.
• Another point he brought up is that if they don't finish their schoolwork, they shouldn't be allowed to watch tv/use the computer or participate in any other "recreation" until it's done.
• He asked me for a "scope & sequence" so he could see exactly what they are supposed to be doing at this age. I pulled out my copy of "What Your Child Needs To Know When" by Robin Scarlata (which I had forgotten I had) and he really liked it. He's going to go through it and spend some time with the kids each night, going over different areas.

And for those of you who may be thinking, "Gee, I wish my husband would be more involved with our homeschooling endeavors," let me assure you, THIS IS THE FIRST TIME HE'S EVER DONE ANYTHING LIKE THIS! Normally, he tells me what I'm doing wrong and let's me continue muddling along.

So this morning, I sat down with both children and discussed their attitudes, their workload, expectations, etc. I explained to them that as they grow older, their workload is only going to get more demanding as they prepare for college. We discussed their complaints about doing work that they don't like and I explained that ALL kids (heck, all adults too!) have to do things that they may not like, but it's just part of life. I told them that they were perfectly entitled to feel that way, but that I did not want to be bombarded day-after-day with complaints that a book is boring or too long or stupid or anything else.

One thing I've decided to change is that I will no longer have them do their assigned reading during our "official school time." This is probably the biggest consumer of their time and it has increased dramatically this year. I'm going to assign this for them to do later in the day. One helpful thing would be to get a second copy of the reading book so they can both read at the same time, so I'll try to do that for the books that are available through the library.

A big part of the solution is something only I can change. I must resolve to be more disciplined and not just throw up my hands when I get too frustrated (though, occasionally, this can be a good thing). I have to learn to work through the problems and encourage my kids to do the same. After all, they are getting their example from me, right?

Another school year has begun here. As always, there were a few minor glitches - Daniel's new math program hasn't arrived yet and Emily's vocabulary book seems to have vanished in the chaos of the last few weeks. But overall, it's been going very smoothly.

As excited as I was about beginning last year, Sonlight's Core 5 was not all that I envisioned it to be. We got drug down in the minutiae of filling in the blanks about places, rather than really trying to "experience them." I ended up skipping the whole section on the Middle East. Initially, I had looked forward to that part most of all, but then I decided that since we've actually been there, Hubby is from there and we are in close touch with his half of the family, and we may end up living there if all goes according to plan, I felt we pretty much were familiar with it - enough to move on anyhow.

But this morning, the history went really well. We are reading Susan Wise Bauer's "The Story of the World." The kids really enjoyed the reading. We also are using an Usborne history book, which are always chock-full of pictures to capture kids imaginations. They loved our new curriculum for Bible - this doesn't replace reading the Bible, but it teaches about the history of the Bible. For instance today we learned about why and how we know that the Bible is really the Word of God - we talked about the ways the ancient scribes copied manuscripts, the Dead Sea Scrolls, what Jesus said about the Bible, and the unity of Scripture. It was really a good reminder for even me!

Dictation went well, our new Read Aloud is starting off a little slow, but I'd been warned about that, and it's just going really well all around! Dinner's in the crockpot, 2 loads of laundry are done. I've only planned a half-day today since our support group resumes it's weekly park meetings today at 12:30.

I'm just feeling really good right now - we are back in the groove!