The Simple Life at Home

First of all, a huge shout-out to Revka over at Designs by RS, who designed and installed my new header. I won this during one of their Christmas giveaways and she very kindly worked with me and made it just perfect for me. Be sure to drop by and check out their blog - they are always offering new discounts and layouts that can spruce your blog up.

If you are anything like me, you have your favorite parts of the Bible and then you have the parts that you, well...that you kind of skip over. Like the minor prophets. I know, I know - they can be a bit confusing and obscure. But, let me tell you, there is power there! In fact, I had a post all in mind from what I read yesterday in both Joel and in Hosea. But then I went to church and our reading was from Jeremiah (who I don't think technically falls under the minor prophets - just in case you wondered).

Most of us have read this verse somewhere. Lots of people claim it as their favorite verse.


But I had forgotten the context. Get this:

Today I just wanted to lie in bed. I have a major case of the blahs. Now, I'm still doing okay with Hubby being gone. I have had a couple of minutes where I've started crying, but pull myself together after a minute and go on. It's been when I've talked to him that it hits me how much I miss him. But I'm really working on the whole "becoming emotionally stronger" thing.

I just have no motivation. I'm bummed because one thing I was actually looking forward to with my husband leaving was that I could throw away a TON of stuff. Hubby is definitely a pack-rat. He saves everything! Apparently it's an inherited gene because his father is the same way. "Someday I might find a use for this one single drumstick." So yesterday I gleefully went through the house pulling out bags and bag and shoebox after shoebox (one of his favorite things to collect) of stuff to dump. Now I just had to wait for the garbage to come so I would have empty garbage cans to put this all in.

They skipped us. Not just us - the whole side of our street. Oh, they did the other side of the street, sure. But no matter how many times I looked hopefully up and down our street, they never came back. Finally this afternoon, I grudgingly went out and pulled my still-full garbage cans back to my yard. So now I have mounds everywhere of things waiting to be thrown away with no place to put it all. It's like living in a Goodwill donation truck.

Even though I feel this way, I had kind of planned on having a couple of bad days after Hubby left, so I decided to just accept it and allow myself two bad days and to determine that on Sunday, I would begin my makeover. So tomorrow I am going to wake up early and walk, go to church, worship my Lord and my Creator, and start this phase of my life with eagerness and anticipation.

It would be easy to just let myself stay in this funk. But that would just be so self-defeating. I feel like I've been there, done that, you know? That's what got me needing a makeover in the first place. Just allowing myself to feel sorry for myself. But the time for change is now.

Well, tomorrow anyway.

Well, technically it's still Thursday. And it's never too late to be thankful, right?

We just dropped Hubby off at the airport. Thus begins our three month stint apart, leaving me as a single parent and Hubby as a single man in a strange country. Not the happiest day, right?

And yet, we give thanks.

Thanks to God for His immeasurable grace. He truly poured it out on me this evening. Now mind you, for the last week I've been crying at the slightest thought of Hubby's leaving. Today I resolved that I wasn't going to let him leave thinking he had to worry about us. I held it together for most of the day. Yes, there were tears at the airport, on everyone's faces. But once he had gone, I comforted my kids and we moved on. By the time we got to the car, we were laughing. I want this to be as easy as possible for them, and that means me being strong. So I'm grateful that God has given me this peace. I imagined myself crying all the way home and crying myself to sleep. But instead, I feel very calm and peaceful.

I'm very thankful for our military. All day today I've been telling myself that it could be so much worse: that he could be going away for a year or more, into a life-threatening situation. So today I have a great appreciation, not only for those who serve in the military, but for their families who are here at home. Thanks to all of you, especially the moms who hold down the fort while dad is away!

I'm thankful for the opportunity to have this three months to work on myself. Somehow when Hubby is here, I'm focused on him. And I never want to give him any indication that I'm starting a "diet" or exercise program, because then if (when!) I slip up, he's so disappointed. This way, he knows nothing about it, so any improvement during this time will be a great surprise for him.

So, that's all for today. I'm off to bed. Still might cry a little, but that's ok. Tomorrow will be better.

For more Thankful Thursday participants, click on over to Lynn at Spiritually Unequal Marriage here.

Do you ever feel as if the relationship between you and your husband has lost its spark? Or as if your hubby just doesn't notice you the way he used to?

You need Fascinating Womanhood!

This amazing book can revolutionize your marriage. Now, I want to be honest right up front and say that this book is NOT for everybody. In fact, some women may be completely turned off by it. And, given that it is an older book, some things may seem quite dated. But the principles contained inside are very powerful.

"What principles are those?", you may ask.

Admiring your husband. Appreciating him. Having an inner happiness that is attractive. Being feminine. Understanding masculine and feminine roles. Accepting your husband for who he is.

When I first began to apply these principles in my life, I noticed that within days my husband was more attentive and had a greater desire to please me. He brought me presents unexpectedly. He spoke to me with more tenderness and affection. And he seemed to have more of a desire to spend time with me. You see, when we seek to please our husbands and build them up, they will seek to please us as well. Everybody benefits!!

I encourage all married ladies to at least give the book a chance. The author, Helen Andelin, is a Christian and there are some Biblical references in it, but it is not one of those books that someone who isn't religious would mind reading.

If your marriage could use a little revving up, pick up the book and try it out. It sure Works for Me!

Welcome to 2008!!! It is now time for the ceremonial making of the resolutions.

I'm one of those people who each year makes resolutions and then breaks them before January 5th. But I'm thinking this year may be different. Since Hubby is leaving in a couple of days, I'll be able to really focus on myself. Doesn't that sound simply atrocious!???!! "Hello, I'm Lori and I want to focus on M-E!"

But I'm hoping you know what I mean. I kind of have in mind this "Extreme Makeover: Lori Edition." And not just physically, although that certainly is in order. I'm talking spiritually, emotionally, and professionally too. I'd like to bring back the woman Hubby originally married.

Sadly, over the years I have let myself go in all the above areas. Instead of being vibrant and strong, I've become boring and needy. Ugh!! Who wants to come home to that every day? Poor guy! So I'm going to take advantage of this time apart to spend some time working on me. Now, don't think I've forgotten I have two children to tend to. Trust me, they aren't going to be neglected. But they know about my plans and are totally on board with me. In fact, Emily has decided she's going to serve as my personal trainer (oh, joy.) and she's using Gillian from The Biggest Loser as her role model.

So what are these big plans, you ask? Well, since you're begging, I'll let you know. But, shhh! Don't tell Hubby. He's completely unaware of my plans.

Spiritual

1. Instead of trying to "live a good Christian life," I want to just simply focus on abiding in Christ. I want Him to be the very air I breathe. I want to live a life of worship.
2. I want to read through the Bible in 90 days. I started it last year, but with my in-laws here (for six weeks!) it was hard to make the daily commitment to read for up to an hour a day. I really enjoyed doing it while I lasted. The point isn't to get deep study, but to get a "big picture" view of Scripture.
3. Once that is completed, I want to take the remaining 9 months and study one book of the Bible in depth each month. I haven't decided which books yet, but I'll let you know.

Emotional

1. Prove to myself that I am stronger than I give myself credit for during Hubby's absence.
2. Work on controlling my emotions, specifically not crying so easily or losing my temper as quickly. This will be a challenge for me because I am one who desperately needs time alone. Without Hubby here, there won't be anyone to provide that and take the kids off my hands for a while.
3. Stop eating for emotional reasons and learn to turn to God for comfort.

Physically

1. Beginning on Sunday, and until I leave for Qatar, I want to do the 6 Week Body Makeover. I've had success on it in the past but Hubby didn't care for the food and it is a very time-consuming with all the cooking and the eating every three hours. I'm not setting any goal for weight loss, just committing to doing the plan and whatever happens, happens.
2. In conjunction with the program, I'm going to go back to walking 5 mornings a week.
3. I will do the strength-training program that is prescribed in the program as well. It uses the bands and it's very easy.
4. I have to start going to bed earlier. I've gotten in the habit of going to bed around 1 a.m. and waking at 6:30 or 7. That's just not enough sleep. It makes me cranky, makes my skin look tired and sallow and definitely contributes to my weight issues. I want to go to bed by 10:30 or 11 at the latest.

Professionally

1. I want to make the separation from Hubby, and the move, as easy on the kids as possible.
2. I want to make sure I quickly establish new routines and household order once we get to Qatar. It's important that we get used to the new city/country/culture as quickly as possible and get the kids meeting new friends, while still making home a familiar refuge.
3. Hubby hates how I pile things up until I can get to them. So a major goal for me is to learn to deal with things at the time rather than have literal piles of stuff that falls over at the slightest breeze.
4. I need to really work hard and learn to overcome laziness.
5. Once we move into our new home, I don't want to allow clutter to accumulate.

So those are my big issues. I'll be sure to keep you updated on my progress as we go along. Oh, and Marybeth at Cheaper by the Half Dozen is hosting a Goals Challenge '08. If you are looking for some inspiration, it's a great place to start!!

So the kids need new passports. Apparently children's passports are only valid for 5 years and cannot simply be renewed, you have to re-apply. And now BOTH parents must appear to apply for the passport (I'm sure to prevent international parental kidnappings). So today we had planned on going to the County Clerk's office to turn in their applications.

First, of course, you need pictures. Now, to understand this entire story you must first understand Hubby and I. We are the living example of the phrase "Opposites attract." Hubby is borderline OCD perfectionist. Every strand of hair must be in place, every thing must be perfect. Me? If their faces are clean, I'm happy. I had taken the kids earlier in the week to get their photos done, but, OF COURSE, they weren't good enough. So he took them and got them done again. Fine - his time and money spent, not mine.

With the passport application you must also submit previous passports and, for children, birth certificates. I had pulled all the necessary paperwork out last weekend and put it aside to have at the ready. But this morning it was gone. I mean, "frantically-sobbing-it's-not-anywhere-in-the-house" gone. After all four of us searching for 40 minutes, I was having visions of another 8 weeks being added to our time here in the States (without Hubby) while I waited for new birth certificates, but Oh Yeah! BOTH parents have to appear to apply. Kinda hard to do when you are in Qatar. I'm telling you, I was crazed. Then Hubby, as a last resort, looked in his briefcase.

And there they were.

He is lucky to still be breathing this New Year's Eve.

Of course, he insisted initially that he didn't know how they had gotten there. Then he said that he must have seen them laying around and put them there for safe-keeping. Uh-huh.

Off we go to submit the applications and necessary paperwork. First the clerk tells us that the pictures are not acceptable because there were shadows behind their heads. Hubby opts to take the kids and get new pictures taken while I finish filling out forms. That should have taken about 20 minutes. Unless you are my husband.

One hour later they return. He had taken them home to change their clothes and do their hair, then argued with the manager at the photo place while I was twittling my thumbs at the courthouse. Needless to say, by this point my nerves were just a little frayed.

Finally we have everything in order and we try again. When the clerk took their birth certificates and stapled them to the application, my chest tightened (we need to show the birth certificates to get visas to Qatar). I asked her to make copies and she said that was illegal, which, technically it does say in the small print on the bottom. I started crying right then and there in front of the clerk and everybody. Now images of them losing their birth certificates, or of delaying our visas an extra 6 weeks are running through my head. Finally I pull it together and we finish up.

Getting through all the red tape just about pushed me over the edge. I'm telling you - the government is out to get me. I think I'm going to go put on a foil hat to block the signals they are trying to send me from outer space.