Sunday, August 24, 2008

Anyone Have Some Salt?

See that slug there? That's me. I've been being a slug for a while now. All my planning and scheduling has been out the window. I have clothes that have not been put away for a week sitting on a chair in my room. Spots on my floor that I'm choosing to ignore rather than wipe up. Kids who are spending their days in front of electronic screens of one sort or the other.

I've been sleeping until 9 or so every day. That's probably because I've been staying up wasting time foolishly until 2 am almost every night. I've been drinking soda left and right (which is surely contributing to my late nights). Today is the first time I've been to the gym. Well, that's not actually correct. I went earlier in the week, walked on the treadmill for 15 minutes and left. I spent more time getting there and back than I did using the gym!

In short, I've been wasting my life.

Yesterday I was flipping through the channels and stopped on Oprah. Now, I am not an Oprah fan. I don't agree with a lot of what she promotes on her show. But once in a while, like when Dr. Oz is on, I will stop and watch. Yesterday was one of those days.

The theme of the day was "heroes." When I turned to the show, Amy Hawkins was on. I hadn't heard her story before, but I was mesmerized by her. Amy's Tennessee home was hit by an F3 tornado, during which she used her own body as a shield to save her two young sons. As her home was destroyed around them, the three were innundated under a pile of bricks. Amy's spine was crushed and she ended up paralyzed from the waist down.

More than the fact that she sacrificed herself to save her children, which I believe most mothers would do, is her determination to live a normal life and not allow this to affect her family.

I've been struggling lately with making the adjustment to living in Qatar. Everything just seems so much harder than it was in the States. Small annoyances add up to make me feel as though I have given up so much. Resentment has started to set in and it's manifesting itself in my laziness and selfishness.

But when I compare my situation to that of Amy Hawkins, I realize that I am being selfish and immature. It's time I got back into the swing of things and make my life, and my family's life, joyful and normal and orderly and beautiful.

We determine our attitude - and I'm tired of feeling sorry for myself. So excuse me now. It's 11:00 p.m. here and I'm off to bed. Tomorrow we will start school and I will get out my household organizer and get back on track.

Thanks for the inspiration, Amy.


Karen said...

I can so totally relate to this. I have felt this way the past two weekends. (Of course, I am blaming it on major headaches, but surely I could do something, couldn't I?) I don't know what the deal is. I just feel...blech. Undermotivated. Maybe I need to find the Dr. Oz segement and watch it.

ValleyGirl said...

Isn't it easy to focus on ourselves and start to feel sorry for ourselves? Scary. I know, I do it all the time, too. You're so right though ~ our attitudes are our own responsibility. I so struggle with living deliberately as opposed to coasting along, doing the bare minimum, and just reacting when necessary. I'm looking forward to the routine that 'back to school' will bring next week. (even though I'm dying a little inside because summer's almost over....)

Traci said...

I'm right there with you. My slugness is way over the top.

Amy lives very close to us. We were in a closet the day of that tornado. Avoided it by the tantrum of a very cranky 2 year old. I was planning on going to Target but scraped it and went home when my girl became too obnoxious for words. I love that girl. We would have been driving right through that tornado!

Amy said...

Praise the Lord you started taking back your life again. I know the feels and attitude you've been having. I've been there. You go girl live as if every moment is our last before we see our Jesus. Praise the Lord for your electric stove.

Mary said...

I think my middle name is slug and has been for about a year now. Hmm...I think they also call that depression don't they? Oh well. I'm looking forward to starting the book study and dragging myself out of this awful pit that I'm living in, both literally and figuratively.

Nancy M. said...

I have been a little lazy too. I'm glad that you are out of your slump and feeling better.

stacey said...

so much of this will fall into place; you are still in the uphill adjustment stage.

i live those days with you! i guess we just have to be happy when we accomplish something, letting the unaccomplished not get us down as much.


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