Saturday, September 6, 2008

Facebook - Friend or Foe?

So, you could say I've been a little obsessed with Facebook lately. In fact, that's part of why I haven't blogged in the last couple of days. All I've been thinking about is who can I search for, what groups can I join, who can I add as a friend.

As I drug myself away this morning to go do the dishes, teach my children, you know, live life, I started thinking about it. Why was I so motivated to find these people that, in many cases, I knew a lifetime ago? Why was I so hurt that the boy from middle school didn't remember me (Shocker!!)? Why did it bother me that one friend posted on another person's wall and not mine?

And I started laughing to myself at how lame I was. Craving the approval of others, finding my self-worth in who remembered me from 25 years ago. Hoping that people will see my list of friends and groups and applications and think, "Wow, she's got it all!"

In reality, I don't have it all. I argue with my husband, my kids misbehave (and apparently at times forget how to do division), my house is often a mess, I'm more than a little overweight, and I'm a big-time sinner all around. And yet...

And yet, I am saved by grace. I am redeemed by the Son of God, who considered me worthy enough to sacrifice Himself for. I am loved by the Creator of the universe, who know all about me - the good, the bad and the ugly.

So, for now, I'm backing off Facebook. Oh, I'll still check to see if any true friends are online, just to catch up. But I'm no longer going to seek out people from my past to see if I was memorable enough. I'm not going to worry any more about what people think of my status or my friend count.

See, I already know where I stand.

p.s. I'm not the only one with Facebook issues - check out Jess' post along the same lines.


Lizzie said...

Ninety percent of Facebook is pathetic, LOL. The mindless games? Blech. But I'm on there. It's great as a portal to connect with people you may not have seen in a while, and I sometimes use the internal message system there to talk to them, but I almost always 'ignore' requests for games etc. Another rule I have - I don't friend ANYONE I don't personally know. Not even a good friend of another friend. The only exceptions I have made to this rule are long time co-message board folk whom I got to know over a couple of years.

As I said, it's a good portal for others looking for you as well. I've connected with some folk from primary (elementary) school and a BFF from early high school whom I'd lost touch with. It stands alone as a site who can do that well (MySpace, blech. Friends Reunited, blech., blech). Everyone knows about Facebook and more of your old buddies will have headed there first so your 'return' on finding people will be greater.

Anything beyond that is a complete waste of time though, LOL. Oh, and another issue for me there is that my real name is visible to everyone. You have to list your real name otherwise there'd be no point, as you want people to find you. But there's no way I'd publicise my Facebook details in Bloggityville - even without the caution there was an article recently - wish I could remember where I read it - about how Facebook makes it RIDICULOUSLY easy for identity thieves to go to town - hometowns, birthdate, kids names, where you went to school....its crazy.


Karen said...

Oh, I didn't know you "facebooked". I started doing it so I could see what my kids were doing. It's amazing who all is out there. Anyway, I friended you this morning. See ya around the block!


Cindy said...

Facebook - Hmm - my nieces and nephews got me into it - but honestly I haven't taken the time to really understand it all.
I did find a couple people from my past and quite frankly I was so disappointed in what on saw on their walls that I didn't even request friendship.
Maybe I'll see you there someday but until then, keep blogging, I enjoy reading.
Blessings, Cindy

Traci said...

That's funny. I've been pretty obsessed with Facebook lately too! I'm having fun but not going crazy.

Jessica said...

oh, yes. my facebook issues lasted four days. then i stopped checking my account!!! ha! i am not mature enough to handle it...i spend WAY too much time on it...time that could be better spent doing on online wife book study, perhaps? hm.


Nancy M. said...

I've never joined facebook, so I don't know what I'm missing. Although, it sounds like not much. You have plenty enough friends, don't worry about those that don't care or remember you.


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