Monday, July 16, 2007

Marriage Monday

We are now back from our trip. If you recall, the challenge I had laid before myself as part of Fruit in Season's 30-Day Marriage Challenge was to be willing to surrender to my husband on the small stuff on the trip. This was a big deal for me, because I am usually one who will fight to the end just to prove that I am right. So, how did I do? Better than I hoped, but I still failed miserably at times. I managed to be gracious when he wanted to go ways that would increase our trip time, but allow him some time to just explore, which he loves to do. And I happily gave up going to places I had planned on to accommodate him. After all, these were minor things in the scale of life.

But it was on the major thing that I blew it. If you've read my previous posts you'll know that our trip to Tennessee wasn't just a vacation - it was a precursor to moving there. Well, about 3 days into the trip, Hubby declared that he wasn't moving there and that he could never leave Miami due to his career. And, ladies, I lost it. Now, to get the bigger picture, you also have to know that we have been considering a move to Knoxville for about 10 months. Prior to that we were planning to move to Colorado, which he also nixed after visiting there. So for two years, I have been getting my hopes up and getting invested in moving to someplace, only now to twice have those dreams disappear.

So I yelled at him and called him names and didn't talk to him for a day and a half. But, you know, God made it alright. Somehow, He softened my heart and made me see that his rationale was correct. He is in such a specialized industry (building in South Florida - hurricane central) that to leave Florida would really mean starting all over again. He would no more have any idea how to build a building in Tennessee than I would. And I couldn't build a birdhouse with a little Home Depot kit. God really stepped in and comforted me.

Then he had an idea. He had the idea of moving to North Florida. He would still be working with the Florida Building Code, he could even conceivably keep his same job, just driving down twice a month to take meetings and otherwise working from home, he'd be near the beach still (which is important to him) and I'd be out of Miami. The area we are thinking about has never had a direct hit by a hurricane either. Something about it's geographical location. Now, I may be setting myself up for disappointment again, but this time, it's his idea. So, once again, I will begin the research process. This time I will keep my heart a little more guarded, but I will trust that God has me in the palm of His hand. He knows where He wants me and He will put me there in His good time.


Christine said...

Thanks for your honesty. It's so hard to have dreams die! I pray for your unity whatever the decision.


Christi said...

Oh Lori - I can honestly say that I would've lost it too. So glad that the Lord was able to comfort you and ease your mind!

Praying that the Lord continues to bless your marriage!

Pearls of Wisdom said...

Dear Lori,

Thanks for sharing from your heart. I know how disappointed you must have been. I have been there before when we planned moves etc. I will pray for you. May the Lord continue to bless your marriage this week and always.

In his endless love,

Angel ():)

Charity said...

Sorry about your dreams being dashed. Have you considered the Texas coast? They probably need hurricane construction there, and the cost of living is probably less than Florida. Also, we don't have state income tax (although we do have high property taxes).

ColoradoDreaming said...

Thanks for sharing that with us. Isn't God good to reward our efforts with His grace and help us to see the direction He wants us to take. I will pray that God will grant you His provision for your move. He has much greater for us than we ever can dream. I know He has a wonderful new home waiting for you!

Leeann said...


That sounds like it could be a great compromise. I admire both of you for being able and willing to work out an idea to look into.

Lori, will you tell me how to put links into my blog like you are doing in yours? I can't figure it out!


blackpurl said...

Thank you so much for being so open!

May God bless you journey no matter where it takes you!


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